Toxic People & Environments

 

Written by: Serena

 

If you’re someone that struggles with self-esteem and deep-rooted insecurities, then my first guess is that maybe you’ve been surrounded by people that haven’t been so good to you. Not because they’re bad people, because I never want to believe that anyone truly is. But maybe they’ve put you down more than anything else, really. And it can be absolutely anyone, your peers, friends, relatives, but you know, I think the worst kind of pain is when the obvious lack of support is coming straight from your own home. – From the people who are meant to be your biggest motivators, your family. Because the truth is, everyone we cross paths with in this life is going to disappoint us. But it sucks when you feel completely and miserably alone, misunderstood, in all aspects of your life. – When you have no one to run to, to escape to. Your escape person so to speak, someone that protects you and sees your heart for what it truly is. Where the love shared is as transparent as it gets. Don’t we all deserve that anyway? That one person, at least?


Now, I started this off by saying that insecurities stem from a lack of support. And I say this because I’ve seen it, felt it, and have had enough experience with unhealthy relationships where somehow, I was always to be blamed. When you’re constantly told that you’re at fault, that everything is all in your head, that your depression doesn’t matter, that your sibling is better, smarter, that you’d never compare… Well what do we do with that information? ESPECIALLY when it’s coming from people that are practically meant to love us? I guess we resort to believing them. We believe it. 


But, you know what I know and believe now? When an individual is saying something negative and lying to you about who you are, the words that are being voiced do not belong to you. They never will. It doesn’t matter who is saying it, your best friend, your mother, or your significant other, it doesn’t matter. Those words belong to the mind and mouth of the one that it is coming from. These people could never define you. I want you to remember this for the rest of your life, because it is truly freeing. Know yourself because as long as you know you, nothing and no one else really matters. The only opinion that matters is yours, and the ones deserving of your love will come into your life and see you for you, too.


Above all else, I do think it’s extremely crucial to acknowledge what you have been through in order to move on and live the life you desire. So, acknowledge that it wasn’t all in your head like they said so many times. The way people have mistreated you and lit you on flames with their words and abusive behavior was always real. 


And you can’t live for their rare good moments and take on their bad whenever it happens. You need to realize what you deserve and what you deserve is a love that makes you feel good. 


You were born into this world to have everything you want and more, nothing less. When you’re in the mindset to commit to your goals, to your dreams, to the future you want, THAT IS WHERE IT ALL BEGINS! The want is what matters because then actions to get what you want will follow.

And… Just hold on a little bit longer, and be who you are, your magical, kind, and brilliant self. The Universe sees and hears you. Everything is coming and happening for you. 

4 comments

  • Cutting out toxic ppl can be sooo difficult depending on the person and the situation. <3 thank you for writing this. I needed this today

    Maija
  • Realizing who the toxic people are is sometimes so hard because we don’t want to. That’s why we need to read about it, hear personal stories etc. so we’ll finally have the nerve to speak about it and believe that it’s ok to leave them. Thank you♡ #leavetoxicity

    Jasmine
  • !!! this post !!!! its funny because you never realize how toxic some people were to your mental health until looking back on it. everything truly happens for a reason!

    kaitlyn
  • i had to show this post to my mom who has been dealing with her toxic father all our lives. she has been really trying to cut him out but the “rare good moments” are what kept her. but with all the things that 2020 has brought us, she has realized that life is too short to keep toxic people in our lives.

    victoria

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